"Disillusionment with our relationships can potentially offer a glimpse of certain truths that can help mobilize ourselves and move us beyond feeling depressed or despaired. No one else can save us from feeling alone or the wounds of our past. Intimate relationships cannot in themselves heal the basic ache of being a separate individual. No one else can provide all the healing love, security, or nurturance we hope and dream of...therefore, it is futile to seek from others the confidence we lack or the love won't provide for ourselves. Painful as these realities are they help ground us in reality and give us a path that we need to connect to ourselves more deeply and develop our own strength and confidence instead of waiting for others to bring these qualities into our lives"

This is a quote from John Welwood's book Journey of the Heart. Many of the quotes featured here are from this book or one of his two other books, Love and Awakening and Imperfect Love, Imperfect Relationships. I like and appreciate Welwood's books because he not only offers what I consider a more honest and realistic view of relationships but his writings challenge us as individuals to dig deeper and offer an optimistic interpretation of the emotional pain which is associated with all human relationships.