Monday, June 6, 2011

Romantic love is one of the most powerful means for pulling us out of literal life into play. In the trance of love, we may neglect our life’s duties and obligations…to be in love is to be in play, to be taken by illusions…and…no matter how unrealistic in relation to the structures of life, no matter how illusory and dangerous, romantic love is as important to the soul as any other kind of love.

I believe there are two common mistakes made by individuals and our society at large regarding romantic love. One is to overemphasize the importance and role of romantic love in a relationship and the other is to underestimate it's significance. When we over estimate the role of romantic love we set ourselves up for potential disillusionment down the road when strong emotional feelings are bound to waver and subside after the early infatuation stage which is a part of all relationships. And, when we downplay it's importance we do so at the peril of missing out or at least experiencing the full potential of the romantic experience which, as the author of this quote suggests,is as important to the other aspects of love. So, the implications are that we need not pit romance against the other critically important aspects of love, nor should we elevate it to a higher status which cannot be maintained during the course of any normal healthy relationship.

2 comments:

kc bob said...

"romantic love is as important to the soul as any other kind of love"

So true Bill. There is such a soul fulfilling aspect to this kind of love. When my first wife died it was as if my soul had been ripped in two.

Bilbo said...

Bob, while I have never experienced the loss of a spouse prematurely to death I have had my share of relationship losses and know the feeling you speak of. While we never totally heal from our losses I am grateful that we can experience the various aspects of love again even though we have been deeply wounded and had our soul ripped into as you put it...