Ever feel like you are banging your head up against the wall regarding your relationships? You've tried everything, counseling, reading books, endless conversations with your partner, and lots and lots of prayer. In our culture today we have come to expect that if we do this or that things will work out and get better but at times life's experiences seem to contradict this axiom. So, what are we to do, give up, leave the relationship, bury ourselves in work, or call time out?...It is not my place to tell anyone whether to go or stay but when I have run out of energy and options and no cure is in sight I have learned that is probably the time to take a deep breath and turn my attention towards caring for my soul. On the surface it may be difficult to see the relationship between caring and nurturing ourselves and fulfilling our responsibility to love our partners/mates but I am of the opinion that these two goals are not mutually exclusive...because...sometimes, void and space are necessary for individual transformation and when we feel nurtured and at peace with ourselves we can't help but be a better partner, lover, friend, and soulmate....I'll conclude with a couple of quotes from Thomas Moore's book called "Care of the Soul"

The vessel in which soulmaking takes place is an inner container scooped out by reflection and wonder. There is no doubt that some people could spare themselves the expense and trouble of psychotherapy simply by giving themselves a few minutes each day for quiet reflections….Akin to pausing, and just as important in care of the soul, is taking time. Taking time with things, we get to know then more intimately and to feel more genuinely connected to them.

Care of the soul requires craft—skill—attention and art. To live with a high degree of artfulness means to attend to the small things that keep the soul engaged in whatever we are doing, and it is the very heart of soul making…but…to the soul, the most minute details and the most ordinary activities, carried out with mindfulness and art, have an effect far beyond their apparent insignificance…Living artfully, therefore, might require something as simple as pausing. Some people are incapable of being arrested by things because they are always on the move. A common symptom of modern life is that there is no time for thought, or even for letting impressions of a day sink in…